[identity profile] hobbit-feets.livejournal.com
Are you in the mood for Baby Boosh with a side helping of weirdly sexual, blurrily-boundaried friendship and foot fetish? Well, HAVE I GOT A FIC FOR YOU! *fingerguns, oh yeah, chicka chickaaa*

Title: Overground
Pairing: Julian Barratt/Noel Fielding
Author: Culumacilinte
Summary: Noel has a thing for Julian’s feet. More or less. It’s all a bit weird.
Rating: NC-17
Word count: 4830

Noel takes to doodling foot monsters, in pencil and sharpie and sloppy acrylic paints. Most of them are only just barely recogniseable as feet; they've got bums or tentacles or ears, strange and misshapen. The foot thing is clearly some kind of grotesque fascination generally, regardless of Noel's individual feelings on his or Julian's individual feet.

[identity profile] hobbit-feets.livejournal.com
Filthy Clusterfuck porn, with no excuses. Would have been very chic here roundabout 2007.

Title: Into Trouble
Pairing: Dee Plume/Julian Barratt, Dee Plume/Julian Barratt/Melvis Crawford, Dee Plume/Noel Fielding
Author: Culumacilinte
Summary: Julian is a drunken hobo shambles, Dee’s got the horn, Melvis helps out. Noel reaps (some of) the rewards later. Filthy moresome porn with no real justification.
Rating: NC-17
Word count: 843

Noel catches Dee later in a corridor and plucks wickedly at the torn tights she’s still wearing, an impish, provoking grin on his face. His fringe is all sweaty, messily shoved halfway off his forehead. ‘What’s this, Delia? You been getting into trouble?’

[identity profile] hobbit-feets.livejournal.com
WHOOPS I've not been reliably crossposting my stuff here for the past few months, so prepare to be INUNDATED with all my new fic. This one isn't really properly Booshfic, but I'd say it counts about as much as any of the Mint Royale stuff that's been written does. Characters loosely inspired by Noel and Julian, et al, let's say.

Title: Bitter Resin and Salt
Pairing: fae!Noel Fielding/OFC, with a side helping of fae!Dee Plume/fae!Sue Denim/OFC, and implied fae!Julian Barratt/fae!Julia Davis
Author: Culumacilinte
Rating: M
Word count: 2511
Warnings: Some dubious consent (ish– faerie enchantment being what it is) and a bit of disturbing imagery
Summary: Follow him into the woods, you know you want to. Here, aren’t you hungry? One of these little fruits, he’ll hold it to your lips for you (just the barest brush of his fingertips against the skin under your mouth, and his skin is so soft, and he smiles so bashfully, as if it were a mistake). Take his hand, this way, watch the roots. (but if you come in, you can never leave).

He twists around the trunk like a glittering, pale-and-black snake, hand uncurling in the air between you. An imperious command to follow, or a childish invitation to join him, a dare, a wicked invocation in the sly scroll of his fingers. Take his hand, this way, watch the roots. (but if you come in, you can never leave).

fic: tourbus

Jul. 16th, 2015 10:34 pm
[identity profile] hobbit-feets.livejournal.com
Title: Tourbus
Pairing: Noel Fielding/Julian Barratt. Ish.
Characters: It's an ensemble piece. Noel Fielding, Julian Barratt, Mike Fielding, Rich Fulcher, Dave Brown
Author: Culumacilinte
Rating: M
Word count: 943
Summary: On a five month tour, sometimes you just need to have a wank, even if a tourbus doesn’t allow for many places to do so in private. A sampling of sneaky tourbus wanks.

‘You gotta dial it down, dude,’ Rich says too loudly, and laughs. ‘I totally heard you bashing one out last night.’

[identity profile] poshlil.livejournal.com
(I posted this a couple of other places last night, so you may have already seen it. But as it took forever and a day to finish, I'm putting it on all my archives in celebration.)

Title: And I Play It On Repeat
Pairing: Noel Fielding/Julian Barratt
Word Count: 1400 + EP
Rating: M (fic) to possible R (EP; I forget how explicit Fall Out Boy can be)
Spoilers/Warnings: language, semi-implied breath play and my usual excessive use of colour.
Summary: There's one thought Noel can never get out of his head.
Disclaimer: Noel and Julian belong to themselves; I just like to make them kiss from time to time. The original photo I used for the EP cover art belongs to Dave Brown.
Notes: Largely written for [livejournal.com profile] cheeerie, and inspired by the Arctic Monkey's Do I Wanna Know. This started as vague tour porn but ended up slightly more specific when the little bastards did Beck's Song Reader last July. Yes, it has taken that long to write. Thank you to anyone who's given it a look over or listened to me whine about the writing process - your advice and care is always appreciated. Any remaining mistakes are mine, and yes, please feel free to point out my typos. (Spelt is not one of them.)
Mirrors: AO3 // Dreamwidth

Waiting is always the worst. )

Warming Up

Oct. 19th, 2013 03:32 am
[identity profile] concupiscence66.livejournal.com
Title:  Warming Up
Author: Concupid
Pairing: Julian/Noel (romantic friendship)
Rating: PG
Warnings:  RPS, just a bit of fun with the warm up gigs and those unphotographed kisses!
Summary:  Noel and Julian reflect on how they've changed as they prepare for Festival Supreme.
Author's note:  It's late at night, but I want to post it pre-festival so forgive the usual errors!  Thanks to the awesome people who have shared stories of those lovely, warm up gig kisses.

[identity profile] concupiscence66.livejournal.com

Title:  The Secret Keeper

Author:  Concupid

Pairing:  Noel/Julian

Rating: R

Warnings: non-explicit sex, RPS, angst

Summary:  Dave gets a new bit of insight.

Author's note:  Thanks to bluestocking79 for her tireless betaing and to everyone who is reading.  You are all awesome.

[identity profile] concupiscence66.livejournal.com
Sorry to abuse the Haven but I don't know where else to go!  Does anyone know the names of Julian's parents? I need their names for important slash related reasons!
[identity profile] freakishlyx.livejournal.com
Title: You Should Never Sleep (RPS)
Author: elevenfeathers
Pairing: Noel/Julian 
Summary: Noel is having nightmares due to exhaustion and Julian's there to help.
Word Count: ~3500
Rating: PG, swearing.
Warnings: there are some disturbing themes, a bit of blood, a bit of bad language.
Disclaimer: I do not own Noel or Julian or any of the Mighty Boosh boys, the story isn't real and I don't mean to be creepy, it just happens. 
Author’s Notes: A big thank you for beta'ing this and being oh so helpful to Mairead ([livejournal.com profile] thejigsawtimess).
This is my first time posting on livejournal so please be gentle! I can take concrit though. 

he has nightmares and they aren’t always contained behind his eyelids; sometimes they seem to seep into reality. )

[identity profile] philomel.livejournal.com
*waves hello timidly*

Working up the courage to post fic in a new-to-you fandom is so flipping hard. I feel like a toddler desperately searching for an adult’s leg to hide behind. But here goes.

Title: The Stone-rabbit and the Wolf-moon
Pairing: Julian Barratt/Noel Fielding
Rating: R
Summary: That line between thinking and doing and how Julian tries to cross it.
Word Count: 3,277
Disclaimer: It’s all made up.

Julian means to move on, he really does. He’s about to brush it off, but, when he looks up, Noel’s got his thumb at his mouth again, the pad of flesh subtly curving up to meet the tip of his tongue. It’s too much: too much meandering talk about nothing, too much wondering and wandering around. And his head must really have one leg shorter than the other, because he keeps coming back to the same place no matter how many times he tries to walk away.
[identity profile] magicunicorn13.livejournal.com
Title: Tender Moments
Pairing or Characters: Noel/Julian
Summary: Noel and Julian have always loved each other. Julian just needs to show it. 
Word Count: 1,230
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: Too many similes
Challenge: First go at writing a proper PWP
Disclaimer: They've never been mine, and thing shall continue that way. This (probably) never happened
Author’s Notes: Yes, the title is really quite bad but I couldn't think of anyhting better. Many huge thanks to my beta who, as always, helped loads with this.

Read more... )

[identity profile] hauntedmuffin.livejournal.com
Title: It Always Ended Up Like This
Pairing: Noel/Julian
Rating: NC-17? I don’t really know what to make it…
Word Count: 1,257~
Summary: No one knew what it was that made Noel feel so detached at social gatherings or main events of their own such as these. He wasn’t even sure. All he knew was that his constant need for Julian grew but so did his want to be left alone.
Warnings: Angst. Implied relations.
Disclaimer: I do not own The Mighty Boosh, Noel Fielding, Julian Barratt or any of its/their affiliates.
A/N: Saw a post on Tumblr and it immediately inspired me to write this. Chugged it out in an hour. I’ve proof read it but that’s about it. Don’t really know what else to say…

Read more )
[identity profile] agentadvocate.livejournal.com
Title: Becoming Heathcliff
Pairing: (implied) N/J
Summary: The lead up to the now infamous Let's Dance reunion, Noel convinces Julian to participate in his routine & recruits him to practice in the confines of his loft.
Word Count: 2'500
(1/4 is a sleepy, midnight phone call)
Rating: PG
Warnings: Fluff
Disclaimer: I do not own the Mighty Boosh and make no profit. Fun was had. No rights were owned.
Beta: [livejournal.com profile] purplefroth

Author's Notes: I've never seen such an OTP in my life be so self-fulfilling in the slash department.
Everyone's doing such amazing pieces about their stage appearance. I wanted this to be a companion piece; the pre-events.

(The setting of furniture to the side is totally stolen with much love from voodoohedghog's Dance for Me, because it made so much sense & was a great inspiration)

... The spinning stops. Noel steadies an arm behind Julian’s back, keeping his other hand’s fingers dug tight into neck muscle ... )
[identity profile] agentadvocate.livejournal.com
Title: It's Me, Cathy
Pairing: implied N/J
Summary: Julian watches Noel's appearance on Let's Dance For Comedy Relief. Enough said.
Word Count: 800
Rating: G
Warnings: Contemplation, Eyeing Up Noel, Mad Dance Skills
Disclaimer: I do not own the Mighty Boosh and make no profit. Fun was had. No rights were owned.

Author's Notes: Sorry to double-post, but this HAD to be done today!


... He’s a square jawed senorita dream; a pointier Florence Welch incarnate. ... )
[identity profile] agentadvocate.livejournal.com
Title: Suspend(ing Disbelief)
Pairing: Noel/Julian
Summary: Julian gets cheeky in suspenders in the back of a cab;
Noel ponders how transparent they are to onlookers;
A cabbie gets taken for a ride on a well played lie.

Word Count: 2'500
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Fluff, Foreplay, Flashbacks
Disclaimer: I do not own the Mighty Boosh and make no profit. Fun was had. No rights were owned.


Author's Notes: I created an actual fic this time, full length & everything!
( Definitely more "conventional" for me; 3rd person past-tense all the way. Shocker! )

...Julian lit up like a pinball machine, filled with lager... )
[identity profile] dontbooafter.livejournal.com
Title: Dressing Room
Pairing: Noelian
Rating: NC-17 (Just to be safe)
Warnings: Slash, Fluffy
Disclaimer. I don't own anyone, not for profit, not my property etc. Just a bit of dirty fun.
Word Count: 1,860
Notes: This is my first fic ever. Feedback is greatly appreciated, unbeta'd.

Sorry! I forgot the lj cut! )
[identity profile] el-gardner.livejournal.com
Title: Forbidden Fruit
Rating: NC-17
Pairing: Julian/?
Genre: Angst. PWP
Word count: 2486
Summary: It was a sordid little place. A secret haven of debauchery - a nirvana for the hedonistic. It was a place ripe with forbidden fruit, just waiting, and eager, to be plucked.
Disclaimer: I, of course, do not own any of the characters within. And in no way is any of this true; it's all just a figment of my sordid imagination. No harm meant and no money is being made.
Author Notes: okay, this is a bit of an experiment for me, so I hope it works and makes sense - the ending especially, and the identity of the other character. No name's mentioned but it's strongly implied (I hope!).

The lyrics at the end are from Portishead's awesome song Sour Times.

As ever, if you spot any mistakes, or have any cc, it's always welcome!

It was a sordid little place... )
[identity profile] jewishkangaroos.livejournal.com
Title: Keep me falling over
Pairing: Noel/Julian (implied)
Summary: AU. Think "The Great Divorce" by C.S. Lewis. Julian is in the middle of a life-after-death dream scenario in which he is a ghost on the outskirts of heaven and Noel is a solid spirit, inherent of this place and trying to take Julian with him.
Rating: PG-13. Pretty light. Some swearing.
Warnings: This could have been written better. The end is a bit abrupt, and I apologize. I have to be up in three hours to get ready for the inauguration of Barack Obama. (Hell yes!!) And sorry for the somewhat religious tone, if that's offensive. I'm going for more literary than religious.
Disclaimer: I claim no ownership of the persons in this story, and I am making no money from this.

“What the Dickens are you on about, you tit?”

[identity profile] jewishkangaroos.livejournal.com
Title: The Sex Has Made Me Stupid (Taken from the RiD song of the same title.)
Pairing: Dan/Jones
Summary: Claire catches Dan and Jones in the act, but instead of betraying her presence or leaving, she stays hidden and watches.
Rating: NC-17. I ain't shy.
Warnings: PWP. There’s about as much plot in this story as there is in any of your run-of-the-mill porn. There are some definite offenses against the English language—a couple of the words I completely made up, fabricated from my own word-hoard. Hope you don’t mind too much. And you'll have to excuse any American-isms you might find. I can't help my vernacular no matter how much I try. Also, there are a few lame attempts at humor and an excessive usage of ellipses.
Disclaimer: I own neither the characters nor the actors who portray the characters. I'm not making any money from this; I am chronically unemployed. With that said, enjoy!

Claire stood slack-jawed, dumbly watching the events unfold before her, events which had one known and inevitable end. She could already feel her own wet excitement.
[identity profile] jewishkangaroos.livejournal.com
Title: A Faithful Narrative of All My Dealings With Mr. Jones
Summary: Jones, um, "deals" with Dan.
Pairing: Dan/Jones
Rating: NC-17 for language, oral and bumming
Disclaimer: I own nothing. I don't even know these people.
Author's Notes: The titles is inspired by Pride & Prejudice, and upon reading this fic, it will be quite evident that I was listening to IAMX while writing it. This is my first time posting here, so please be gentle. I hope you enjoy it!

Click here for a good time.


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