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booshslashhavenErmm hi :) This is my veryyy first post so please dont expect much haha. I hope you like it, but if not then do tell me. All critisizm is welcome :D Unfortunally, i dont own anyone mentioned in this fic and it certainly didnt happen. So yeah... here it goes!
As Delia Gaitskell began to wake up on the freezing morning of January 19th, the first thing she noticed was the strong stench of disinfectant, which made it clear straight away she wasn’t at home in bed. The only thing she could smell first thing in the morning at home was Noel burning another piece of toast, breaking yet another toaster.
BLEEP BLEEP BLEEP BLEEP
“SHIT not again!” BLEEP BLEEP BLEEP “SHUT UP! You’ll wake Dee you prick!”
Yes, Noel was talking to a smoke alarm. Dee giggled as she stood in the doorway of her room to see her gorgeous boyfriend, wrapped up in her large dressing gown, eyeliner smeared underneath his eyes, hair jutting out at a number of different angles and standing on a chair with a broom, trying to stop the irritating bleeping noise before it woke his precious girlfriend.
“Need a hand?” she asked as she made her way over to Noel, grabbing his tiny waist as she helped him off the chair.
“Shit Dee I’m sorry. I know it’s your first day off since the end of your tour and you wanted a rest. I was attempting to make you breakfast in bed, but as you can see.. it didn’t work out as well as I had imagined.” Noel looked up at Dee as she stepped off the chair after successfully turning off the alarm.
“Hey,” she said lightly, pulling noel in closer. “A bit of jam and butter and hey presto! You’ll never tell.”
Noel laughed, “I think it’s going to take a bit more than jam and butter babe. It looks like it’ll turn into ash the minute you touch it.”
“Yeah well, maybe I like ash toast. It brings out the flavour of the jam more.”
Noel laughed at the thought of Dee purposely burning toast to make the jam taste nicer, and then cringed as he imagined how awful it would actually taste.
Dee slowly began to open her eyes, squinting ever so slightly as the harsh sun light beamed in through two thin blue pathetic excuses for curtains. As her beautiful brown eyes began to adapt to their surroundings, becoming less and less blurry, she could tell that she wasn’t lying in the comfort of her own bed. But a small, single hospital bed, surrounded by pristine white walls and wipe able surfaces. She froze as she realised she was alone.
“Where is he? Where’s Noel? And what am I doing in a hospital bed?” she immediately thought to herself as reality began to kick in.
Dee suddenly sat up, but just as quick as she rose up, she fell back down due to the sudden bolt of pain rip thought her side.
“SHIT! WHAT THE..?” As she looked down under the wafer thin sheets keeping her covered, she noticed three large bandages to the right of her slender waist, each complete with its own blood stain in the centre. Dee held her head tight as memories of the previous night began to flood back.
“Fuck me its cold.” Dee spat out as she hung onto Noels green leather coat in the freezing temperatures on the night of January 11th. The roads where deserted, apart from
Four figures walking aimlessly towards the taxi rank in the form of Noel Fielding, Dee Plume, Julian Barratt and Sue Denim and the light sound of mixed music seeping out of the many clubs surrounding them.
“Hey Ju, remember the time we went in there after our last gig in the hen and chickens? Mental night.” Noel laughed as he remembered Julian dancing in the middle of the crowded dance floor absolutely smashed as everyone looked on horrified.
“Yeah. But the question is noel. Remember the fight you got into after we left? Just because some other bloke was tying to ‘copy your look’?” Julian replied leaving noel to remember the numerous amounts of cuts and bruises he was greeted with as he woke up the following day.
“Your such an idiot sometimes noel. You know that right?” Sue giggled.
“Hey! He even had my trademark polka dot skinnies on with gold Chelsea boots! The twat wasn’t even thin! He was at least an extra large!”
Everyone burst into hysterics as they imagined some chav walking around Camden attempting to be noel.
“Ju grab that taxi quick! We’ll all go back to noels and then me and you can order a taxi back to our places from there, yeah?” Sue asked as she pointed out the black cab about 30 meters ahead.
“Yeah sure. Ok.”
The four of them clambered into the taxi as Dee gave the driver the address to her and noels new Camden apartment.
10 minutes later and they had arrived at their destination. “That’ll be £8.75 please darlin.”
“Here, take £10.” As dee handed the money over to the driver, Noel and Julian made there way out of the vehicle.
However, what happened next, made the foursome wish they had just stayed in the cab and diverted to Julian or Sues instead..
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no subject
Date: 2009-01-12 09:20 pm (UTC)you don't think you could put the fic under a cut though?
<*lj-cut "your text here"> (minus the *)
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Date: 2009-01-12 09:39 pm (UTC)how do i get it so that its not all on the front page?
x
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Date: 2009-01-12 09:48 pm (UTC)I'm going to read the fic now, haven't read it yet. ;)
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Date: 2009-01-12 09:56 pm (UTC)Noel laughed as he remembered Julian dancing in the middle of the crowded dance floor absolutely smashed as everyone looked on horrified.
That mental image made me laugh out loud.
Is there another part? :)
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Date: 2009-01-12 10:01 pm (UTC)iv managed to do it :)
Thanks guys haha :)
And colabottles, i have a next chapter coming right up :)
Thanks again!
xx
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Date: 2009-01-13 12:30 am (UTC)Some of the capitalization is wonky, but apart from that, I'm certainly intrigued! I love Dee :D
Off to read part 2!
no subject
Date: 2009-01-13 02:33 am (UTC)I said something along these lines only this fair morn. lol, That'll teach me to try and make toast whilst being on the phone.
haha. *reads part 2*